The beauty of Hualian lies in Taroko Gorge. Granite canyons laced with greenery only Taiwan can produce. Our vacation style turned very relaxing and we ended up taking our time - much more than the guide planned on us taking at each spot. I guess this is why we had a private guide and not a tour group so we could talk, enjoy time together as a family, and catch up!
One of the sites in Hualian worth a specific mention was Water Curtain Cave, part of Baiyang trail that we hiked.
Our first vacation out of Singapore was to Taiwan for Christmas and New Years. Janae left at the beginning of December to be with her parents and I joined her two weeks later for Christmas and New Years. Mom, Mary and Debbie were going to Taiwan as well - I was excited to be able to see everyone again!
This would also be the first time Verene sees her great grandmother, great uncles and aunts as well.
Every time I see a little girl here in Singapore I can't help but think of Verene. I fixate my eyes on the girl and take in everything she does. I'm sure the parents have thought me some sick pedophile but I can't help missing my little girl. I think of all the stuff I get to see her do when I see her again - all the stuff I see the girls here do like holding Daddy's hand while walking, only stepping on certain color tiles through the subway, going up steps one at a time - always with the same foot forward, laughing and running around the playground, tired and falling half asleep on Daddy's shoulder, and so much more.
I miss all the little things she did before I left and all the new things I hear about ...
Big Smiles
In general Verene is a very happy baby. I'm sure her sleep habits have a bit to do with her being so happy. She goes to sleep at 7pm and doesn't wake until 6 or 7 for a feeding after which she goes back to sleep until 8 or 9 am. The best part of her sleep is she respects the morning. When Janae awakes, she usually finds Verene awake playing by herself in the crib making no noise! She does the same for me on Saturday when I sleep in! She knows to keep quiet until we get out of bed to get her.
My Tongue
Other Expressions
Janae and I can't help but laugh at baby as she discovers the world with pure innocence.
First time rolling over
Verene was besides herself the first time she rolled over on her own at about 4 months. She was on her back ready to take a nap and accidentally rolled over landing her face in her hands. Not knowing what happened she started to cry but quickly stopped as she fell asleep. When Janae rolled her over after her nap, Verene's face was marked with her hands.
Conversations with Panda
Things above my head
Of course, she's cutest when she's sleeping
"She's just looking at her hands" was the answer I got when I asked what Verene was doing one afternoon. I couldn't help but smile at the cute innocent gesture. Verene discovered her hands at about 3 months of age. It started as Janae said, simply holding them out and looking at them occasionally moving them about.
Being new to hand movements, it took little Verene a while before getting a handle on how to control them. The first thing she wanted to do was put them in her mouth, however, her lack of coordination made for quite the show at first. She would start with her hands in the air above her while laying on her back. Slowly she would move her hands closer to her face and hit herself in the cheek or other part of her face as she missed her mouth. On good attempts, she would miss her face completely.
Determination is the lesson learned as Verene eventually mastered the hand-in-mouth. Her favorite move became the combo - one hand in mouth the other extended to look at. - until she decided eating both hands was best. She's still on the eating both hands stage.
It was about 3-4 in the afternoon on a Friday and I was at work going about the day when I received a phone call from Janae. She was on her cell phone and I could hear Verene crying in the background. Between her cries she would call 'mama...wawawa...mama...wawawa.' I was shocked! Janae and I had competed fiercly for her first words to be 'mama' or 'dada.' Well, given the amount of time she spends with baby, it didn't surprise me that I lost.
The next morning Janae confessed that Verene hadn't said her first word and that 'mama' sound came as Celeste moved Verene's chin up and down with her hand as she was crying. It was more like 'wawawawa' (move her jaws up and down) 'mama...wawawa.'
Within a week, Verene started saying 'mama' for real. It hit me when I was getting her ready for bed one evening and she started crying and called for 'mama' in her crying. When Janae showed up and held her, she stopped. Some evenings she just wants Mom.
The Getz and Deckers both had babies about the same time as Verene. Around Christmas time the Deckers had us and other friends over and we were able to get a picture of the three of them together!
It's amazing to think that 2007 is already past and it's almost February! Between getting used to being new parents, having Janae's parents living with us, and remodeling the kitchen and a half-bath, the year ended on a hectic note. I feel as if things are finally kind-of returning to normal. I'm finding time to look at pictures of the cutest baby in the world and reflect on how fast she is growing! It feels like just yesterday that we had her baby blessing at the church but that was just 2 months and a couple baby clothing sizes ago.
Verene is SO cute when she eats. Her little hands aren't large enough to grab the bottle so she grabs the index finger of the hand holding the bottle. If I start pulling the bottle away, she'll tighten her grip and pull my hand back in. She's basically telling me "Don't even think about taking my bottle away!" I guess I better not mess with her when she's eating.
Well before she finishes her bottle, she will fall asleep with the bottle in her mouth to take a break. As soon as I try to move the bottle from her sleeping mouth, she'd wake and cry. Somehow even in her sleep she is conscious of where the bottle is...ALWAYS. After putting the bottle back, she'll stop crying and start eating until she falls asleep again.
We've started her on some solid foods now. It's very obvious she is not a fan of them. She even recognizes the jars. When she sees the jar she'll immediately close her mouth. It doesn't matter if she was smiling and laughing or just dazing out into nowhere, she knows well what the jar means - veggies. I guess it's genetic. Kids don't like veggies. If it was me, I'd take the breast over processed food any day.
Today was the first time I felt real pain because of my daughter. It was in middle of my work day when I got a call from Janae. Her voice didn't sound quite right and I remained calm while she explained what happened. She was cutting Verene's nails (you know where this is going) and accidentally cut her finger. I cringed in my seat picturing her delicate fresh tender skin broken by metal. My heart sank and I almost cried out of pain for her. Janae obviously felt terrible as well. Blood dripped down her little finger and eventually stopped.
The beauty of the experience for Janae and I was the babe's reaction. She initially cried but quickly turned it to a big smile - the kind where her eyes are closed and she's grinning ear to ear - as Janae picked her up and held her. Imagine having blood running from your hand for the first time and having zero animosity towards the one who caused the pain immediately after the act, even if the act was unintentional. As this is the first time she got hurt, perhaps she didn't know how to respond in anger or spite. Her naive innocence and immediate forgiveness of Janae is simply sweet. Both of our hearts melted. How can we not love such a child? This must be what Jesus meant when he instructed us to be as a little child - forgive quickly and hold no animosity in your heart.
When do we learn to not immediately forgive and give a big smile instead of feeling the some degree of anger?
Do I love and forgive my parents unconditionally knowing they never intended to hurt me?
I experienced the perfect response to both of these lessons today from a 4 month old babe.
OK. It's true that Verene keeps us up at night and Janae and I occasionally suffer from sleep deprivation. It's not a pretty sight. Amazing how much our pleasant temperaments and basic cognitive abilities are tied to how much sleep we get. This brings me to sleep story number 2 for me (How come number 2 for me and not even 1 for Janae yet? Unfortunately I'm so out of it at night that I can barely function, let alone remember stories about Janae). According to Janae, while sleeping with my pillow folded over under my head one night, I heard the baby cry. To soothe Verene, I took the pillow from under my head, put it on my chest, and started to pat it gently. The crying continued as Verene gained no benefit from me patting the pillow next to her, so I put the pillow higher on my shoulder and continued patting her gently adding a "shhh" to the repertoire. Janae was busting up and could barely keep herself contained. In fears of waking me and ending her entertainment, she ran downstairs as to not make noise and grabbed the camcorder. I woke up shortly to see a her lying in bed next to me holding a camcorder in her hand waiting for me to calm my pillow again. It was a one time instance and she never got me on tape.
What keeps us going? Well, Verene smiles now when we pick her up at night and stops her violent wails for help. She's just too cute! Good thing because that's exactly what keeps her alive. Why are all babies so cute? I have a theory...only the cute ones survive. The not so cute ones, well, we just don't know. And the not so cute ones that we still see around? Their parents have different opinions and are probably thinking the same thing about ours.
While being up one night with her, I took out the camera and had a great time with Verene's night time activities! From the 1st picture, Janae calls Verene her little caterpillar because she looks like she's in a cocoon all swaddled up. The pics of her playing with the mobile are right before going to bed. She's gaining better use of her flailing arms which she loves to have up by her head or in the air.
We have been more popular than usual lately with neighbors, friends, and family all coming to visit Verene. Here are pics of a few visitors.
In Taiwan, it is tradition to celebrate the 1st month of a baby's life because it is a huge feat to make it that long! This originated long ago when it was not uncommon for babies to not make it one month. We dressed Verene up as you can see and as with all baby related celebrations, we enjoyed the yummy traditional celebratory foods (chicken and rice) while we put Verene in her chair off to the side.
We finally took her out to church a little after a month. The thing that everyone loves most about her? Her hair! Gotta love the dew.
Verene dressed up as Tigger for Halloween. Her cousin Celeste was a shark. We went over to YIwen and Tacheng's house with other friends and their kids. Finally, we don't have to dress up our dog to go trick-or-treating! This year Putter stayed home. Sad. He has been neglected since Verene came into our lives as all of our energy goes now to her. Good thing is he has been good about accepting his new status in the family behind the baby. The pic below is of him depressed in his basket - where he spends most of his days now.
It's been 3 weeks now and time has really gone by! Verene is growing. In fact, she already grew out some clothes by 2 weeks! I was shocked. I've always heard that there will be some clothes that she only wears once or twice which I never believed. It started sounding so cliché, now I know it's true. This is the first outfit she outgrew. Her aunt Autumn was the kind donor.
After feedings at night I hold her on my chest sometimes to put her to sleep. She sleeps real well while laying there. Whenever she starts fussing or crying, I simply start patting her back and she calms down again. In fact, she's laying on my chest sleeping right now as I type. I'm reclined as far back as my chair will go and typing with my neck cocked up to see the monitor. One night she was up with Janae feeding and started to cry for some reason. Out of total reflex, I started patting my chest and shhhhh-ing thinking she was there. WIth body asleep, my mind was aware enough to know she wasn't there and started patting my shoulder thinking she was there instead. I continued quite happily never waking to her wail thinking I was dutifully calming our daughter. Janae just looked at me and couldn't stop laughing. She was only able to catch me with her really on my chest on another night. I guess I'm a really deep sleeper because the flashes didn't wake me either.
The largest adjustment is not having 'free' time anymore. I found myself always doing something in the evenings and on the weekends - out with friends, to dinner, shopping, working on church responsibilities, or even running errands. Now we spend the weekends in the house watching and caring for Verene's every need. It amazes me how much time it takes to fulfill the most basic needs.
It is interesting to think of all the excitement in preparing for the coming of the baby. Getting baby stuff, reading a heap about baby care, thinking how our life will be changing, and the enthusiasm and support from friends and co-workers (we ended up having 3 different baby showers! One from our friends, my co-workers, and again with other Chinese friends who wanted an excuse to get together and eat! All this culminated to one moment...birth...and then the crying and sleepless nights started.Welcome to the club. Misery loves company. Sorry I couldn't tell you earlier.
What a contrast! For Janae and I, the birth was a special experience but I am learning now the love grows day by day and week by week (not to a month yet!).
Verene's top 10:
10. Brought the in-laws to town for 3 months!
9. Sleeps during the day to have energy to cry at night
8. Healthy lungs...really healthy!
7. Lots and lots of hair. No surprise. Look at Janae and I
6. Really cute ears and little hands
5. Passes out after each feeding. I wonder what mom's on? Good thing she inherited my deep sleep habits. It's impossible to wake her - not even with cold water to the face.
4. Everyone looks different to me now knowing they were once somebody's little baby...especially all women who were once daddy's little princess.
3. Her feet can fold up and touch her shins. I actually recognize them from the womb. Janae and I would feel a hard something that we thought were her feet and play with them before Verene was born. We'd push on it and she'd push back. I know now it was indeed her feet...surreal.
2. Sleeps best laying on my chest.
1. Name won't be confused with Vera Wang.
Janae and I loved the name Vera and were planning to use it as our baby girl's name. It comes from the latin word veritas meaning truth and faith (interesting that one word entails both meanings). The name is unique and has a good meaning. Neither of us made the connection with Vera Wang. I had heard of the name once or twice before but didn't know she was a designer let alone a famous one. Upon hearing the name people's reaction were 'I've never heard of that before' or 'Oh, Vera, like Vera Wang.' After hearing the latter comment a few times we considered making a change. Seeing a commercial in the postpartum room for Vera Wang shoes sealed the deal. We had to reconsider.
To change or not to change? It is the name that we wanted to name her and since we are her parents, it is our prerogative. Huang does sound awfully similar to Wang but as a couple people pointed out, they are actually quite different. Debbie's friend from MIT actually didn't get it and kept saying but the last names are completely different. I don't think this reaction is the norm. The association will be made. Growing up can be tough and having a famous person sounding name doesn't make it easier. Out of consideration for her, we chose Verene. It's a variation of Vera, has the same meaning, and is different enough from Vera Wang.
Verene Huang (黃子宜）was born on September 18, 2007 at 7lbs 14 oz and 20 inches long. As a new daddy, I do have to say she is the cutest baby in the world...really, the entire world. OK, at least my world.
We had my Mom over for Mother's Day where we enjoyed crab and seafood stuffed salmon among other yummies. I love my Mom and it's wonderful that she's close so we can enjoy such holidays together. How grateful I am for all she has sacrificed to raise her 3 kids BY HERSELF!!! I have a pregnant wife and have incredible respect for ANY parent for what they have gone through...and our baby isn't even here yet!
week 22 pictures
Is this Janae's first Mother's Day? Jason Greenfeld put it best when he said it depends on which political ideology you subscribe to. I hedged my bet and treated it as such. It'll be less of a question for next year. Born? Not yet. Mother? Maybe. Mother-to-be? Definitely. Alive? Definitely. The thing is kicking! I felt it for the first time today, May 20th. The baby girl is alive and well.
The doctor was an older short skinny doctor with glasses. I later found out he had previously run three hospitals, a ultrasound school for over 20 years, and now is hired on a consulting basis by Kaiser. Needless to say, he was very experienced. He kept on saying he just does what he's told and couldn't deal with the bureaucracy anymore. I've read a bit lately and been thinking of a bit about situations where hospitals, insurance, and the risk of law suits creates policies that may not be necessarily in the patient's best interest. I tried to get him to comment on these situations and he said he couldn't comment as he was employed by hospital and referred me to administration. I wish he would have talked. He was still very nice and gave us more pictures than he was suppose to telling us not to let the hospital know.
The first shot of the face I saw looked like an alien. Unfortunately it didn't get too much better, but were able to find out it is a girl. Usually the doc gives 85% guarantee that it's a girl. He's giving us 95%. I think the picture is pretty definitive...I really hope he's right. May have other issues if he's wrong.
As he got going, it was amazing to see all the devloping features on the baby. You can see the parts of the heart, brain and other systems developing. My favorite was the circle of willis.
Getting to be at the sonogram was a miracle in itself...
Janae and I found out at the beginning of this year that we are expecting a baby. I still remember the morning that she awoke me. She said she wasn't feeling well and hadn't felt quite right for a few days and had a suspicion that she may be pregnant. The pregnancy test affirmed her suspicion. I was in a bit of shock. I made her take the test again. Positive. Over the next few days she took a few more just to be certain.
We wanted to do it again when we went to the doctors for our first visit, but they said that it wasn't necessary as the home tests test for the presence of the same chemical. It was our little secret for the first few months as this is the highest risk period. No need to get people worked up especially if something happened.
As time passed, both of us got more and more excited that someone was going to join our family!
